Chapter 14:

     The tranquil breeze blowing outside gently hushes the day away, welcoming the early stars of twilight to peek through the beautiful full trees on the Kent farm.

     The peacefulness of the porch steps allow Audrey a quiet moment to reflect on her emotions regarding the inevitable path it seems she must take.

     Finding joy in the simplicity of life in Smallville was not something she had expected. At the bottom of her rapidly fraying rope, she had come to be near Lex, feeling lost in a world without him. Yet the fear of standing alone against Lionel led her to seek refuge in the company of the only one who was strong enough to stand with her and escape unscathed. Yet, that pivotal piece of evidence that proclaimed Clark powerful enough to protect her dually confirmed everything she feared about Lex would undeniably come to fruition.

     As the sad reality of her situation rolled through her mind, her fingers played with the scroll that sat on her lap. Ironically she who had tried so hard to avoid being used as a pawn in the epic struggle between father and son sat holding the piece that could forever change the game.

     "Audrey, honey, do you need a sweater or something? It's getting awfully chilly out here," Martha says, coming out of the screen door, disguising her genuine fear for Audrey's well being  as gentle mothering.

     "I'm fine," she confirms, wrapping her fingers around the rolled print, tucking it into the folds of her shirt. "Mrs. Kent, I donít want to burden you anymore, but I feel like I need to share something with you, do you mind sitting down for a moment?" Audrey asks, taking the step down the road in which she cannot go back.

     Grateful for the invitation to engage in any conversation with Audrey, Martha quietly closes the kitchen door behind them, taking a seat next to her on the steps.

     "I've decided I have to leave Smallville," Audrey begins, the words proving even harder to speak then they were to think.

     Martha sits quietly, reading Audrey's need to get this out without being interrupted.

     "I came to Smallville because of Clark, I thought I would be safe here," she says, able to speak the heavy words matter of factly. She pauses, turning her face away from Martha, feeling the strain of her guilt. Letting out a sigh, she comes clean. "That's not true. I came to Smallville because I was foolish enough to believe that somehow I would be able to erase the past. I wanted to believe that I would be able to go to Lex and live happily ever after in his beautiful castle hidden away from the world," she says, longing apparent in her distant stare.

     "I just never considered that the prince would have more of a moat guarding him than the one guarding the castle."

     "Oh sweetie, most men come with walls built around them," Martha offers, trying to comfort her, but fearing that Audrey's dream can never come true.

     Audrey looks up at Martha, smiling with appreciation for the sentiment. Sadly though she knows her situation is not one that can be fixed by a session of girl talk discussing men and their issues with commitment. She had to face reality, which meant she had to share with Martha the reasons she had come, and the reasons she had no choice but to leave.

     "Lionel came here today," Audrey says, obviously still shaken from the event.

     Martha's eyes widen, shocked that Lionel was able to penetrate her home; saddened that she was not able to protect Audrey.

     "He's never going to leave me alone."

     "Does he know about the baby?" Martha quietly asks, hoping Audrey can forgive her for being so forward.

     Audrey's head whips around, surprised that her secret had been found out. Her eyes meet Martha's, seeing a level of compassion she had not seen from anyone before.

     "No one does."

     "I'm sorry I didn't mean to pry. It's just, well, I just sensed it," Martha says.

     "If tonight's going to be about secrets, than I feel I must share another one with you," Audrey trepidatiously says.

     Martha swallows hard, fearing what's to come, but instinct forces her to nod her head in agreement, and allows Audrey to proceed.

     Audrey slowly pulls out the rolled up painting, presenting it to Martha with as much trepidation one would have in handing over their own child.

     Within, it holds the written truth, the words whose presence represent everything she had so long prayed could not be true. Hidden within the man she loves was a force stronger than she could fight against. A blackness darker than her mind could conjure up in the midst of her worst nightmare. The man she loved more than life itself had brewing within him the desire to rid the world of one, the only one, who could save it from pain and destruction.

     This insatiable drive to conquer was a seed planted by his father before he was even old enough to comprehend the difference between right and wrong. Despite the claims of her childhood teachings that right would always win out over wrong, Audrey knew with every fiber of her being that the power the Luthorsí possessed could crush anyone who they set out to destroy.

     She held onto the faith of the power within Clark. The power she was not fully able to comprehend, but trusting that there were reasons why she could not. She clung to the belief that the purity of heart that she witnessed by being in his presence was but a sliver of the light of goodness that flows within him. She had no choice but to believe that the unparalleled source of power within Clark, the light of one who was meant to shine brighter than any, would somehow be able to bring Lex out of the darkness that would one day inevitably consume him.

     "I want you to have this," Audrey begins, keeping her eyes on the rolled paper as Martha slides it out of her grasp. "Letting it go is one of the hardest things I've ever had to do."

     Martha continues to assume the worst, bracing herself for the contents of the paper Audrey is entrusting her with. Seeing the assurance that she is deserving of this gift in Audrey's heavy eyes, Martha slowly unrolls it, revealing the odd self portrait created in the asylum.

     Martha, confused, searches Audrey's face for an answer. Audrey seems to have been hit with a wall of emotions, her eyes immediately filling with water, her trembling hand moving up to cover her mouth.

     "Did you paint this?" Martha quietly asks, delicately trying to understand the importance of the piece.

     Audrey shakes her head, wiping away the few tears that were shook free with the motion. Inhaling deeply, she squares her shoulders, taking back control of the situation. "No, Lex did in Belle Reve," she says, swallowing against the large lump in her throat.

     Martha looks into the painting, her expression illustrating that the image seems to tap into her fears about Lex as well. "I'm not sure I understand," she begins, quickly answered by Audrey's hands flipping the paper over, revealing the handwritten text.

     As Martha begins reading, her concern seems to deepen with every word her eyes pass over. It pains her to think that anyone could see Clark's powers as useful for anything but greatness. These written words depicting him as a force to be destroyed felt like a dagger through her heart. Yet, she couldn't help but continue to hold onto her belief that Lex was not the monster his father had raised him to be, just the same as how she had always wondered what mightíve happened to Clark had he been found by someone devious that day in the field.

 She often wondered what kind of man Lex would be had his mother never passed away. So many times she had longed to guide Lex as she did Clark. She often felt sorry for Lex. Seeing him as a lonely boy who lived a life that seemed doomed. She understood that despite the riches, fame and power that were his birthright, he was lacking those elements which she knew were most valuable in a person. She wished she had the means to nurture him, teach him, and above all. love him. The sad truth that his mother's untimely death had denied him the wonderful benefits and special love only a mother can provide.

     "Honey, he was very sick when he wrote this," Martha says, always able to see a silver lining in any cloud.

     Audrey nods, unable to bring her eyes to meet Martha's. She knew down in her heart that Lex's feelings towards Clark's powers were not based on mental illness. He had been drugged, and tricked into believing he was insane, but the truth was that he wasn't so far gone to not understand his thoughts. No, what he had written was truly how he felt. As an educated and sane man he penned those words, reasoning his own venomous wrath towards the justice Clark stood for as a greater justice towards mankind. She knew had his memories not been taken from him, he would have already begun his attacks against Clark, and anyone who tried to stop him.

     The hardest part of this realization for Audrey was how she knew he would be able to justify his motivations. His clouded vision of himself when it came to matters of power was indeed one of the traits he inherited from his father that she despised the most.

 "I still want you to take this. I want you to have it, for Clark," Audrey says.

 Martha rolls up the painting, giving in to her friend's wish.  She's unsure of what Audrey is feeling, but she knows that if what Audrey and Lex had was anything like what Martha and Jonathan share, than Audrey knows best. This thought terrifies Martha, not just for Clark, but for Audrey.

 Martha senses that Audrey is exhausted. She summons up her best mommy smile, kisses her on the forehead and leaves.